Trusting the Universe: A post for the Creatives

This is a post for the creatives, the ones who dare to see the beauty in this world and create a life for themselves that defies the ordinary.  It is for those who feel stuck, lost, or searching to find their inner knowing.  This one is for you.  

I was scared, paralyzed by the fear of the unknown and fighting with a belief system that whispered warped words playing off of my deepest insecurities.  I’m not always quick to trust or easy to give up control.  I’ve been this way as far back as I can remember.  If I wasn’t supporting myself - emotionally, financially or spiritually - then who was going to support me?  Surely not this Universe, it had proven to me time and time again that this is an unsafe world where only the strong survive.  I had lost touch with my vulnerability, my femininity, and my intuition, my true inner strength. But as I began to change my mind about the world, as I started to take responsibility for what I saw and how I reacted to it, I began to shift.  Could I trust the universal energy that gives birth to the sun and sleeps with the moon, its lullaby the starlit sky?  I so desperately wanted to, and it is through this willingness that the Universe began to unfold for me as a vacuum of love. Most of us are captivated by this force but have yet to fully awaken to it and understand why.  Can we trust it? Could I? I didn’t have all the answers but I knew that I had to try because I decided to start a company that required me to.  And so the journey began.  

We get so consumed by our basic survival needs, our day to day responsibilities and our to-do lists that many of us forget to connect to the magic of our souls.  You know of the magic I speak of - it is the force that causes you to open your eyes in the morning and the unchanging witness to a life in a state of constant flux. Although it’s been part of my practice to sit in silent moments with myself, asking questions and befriending this witness, I’ve never fully trusted the answers I’ve received.  And then, one day, I took the first step and started my own business.  I started Chalice Grove as a hobby to help myself heal as I went through a journey that exposed all of my deepest wounds.  I knew I could help others’ heal because I had done the work myself and when that tiny voice in my head got too loud to ignore, I started this company and dabbled in it’s potential for over a year.   It’s a funny thing trusting your intuition, doors open inside your heart that you never knew existed and that’s how I began to create sacred prayer and meditation jewelry.  Once I opened that door, I was shortly thereafter guided to work with archetypes.  Archetypes are universal projections or patterns of power that underlie all human experience and behaviour.  They are ingrained in all of us and if we are aware of the the Archetypes playing out in our lives we can have a better understanding of who we are and why we are here.  But who was I?  And why was I here? Too afraid to step into this calling full-time, I continued to work at a job that I knew would support me financially, but unfortunately it started to take up too much of the time needed to create.  I began to see and connect to the archetypes in my life.  I knew I was being called to step into my warrior in a new way, my lover, and my high priestess but first I needed to step into my inner healer and shaman, and my mystical essence.  Only then could I transcend my lower level emotional states and release the control of my limited financial, emotional and spiritual capacity.  I needed to let go of my job.  I knew I needed to create the space to allow my spirit to soar but to let go of a steady income seemed preposterous.  So much fear filled my body as I began to replay old belief systems that no longer served me.  It took weeks until I finally built up enough courage to tell my boss that it was time for me to dive into my heart’s calling and I was met with such an overwhelming sense of love and support.  They say that everything you want is on the other side of fear, and once I spoke my truth it almost seemed laughable that I had built up this resistance in the first place.  There were so many days that filled me with anger for not taking action, sadness that I didn’t believe in myself enough to take the leap, and disappointment that I couldn’t trust what I was being guided to create in the world.  I knew I didn’t want to look back on my life with discord and regret for not stepping into the person I knew I could be.  

Here is one of life's many secrets, the moment you chose to let go of the struggle and brave flowing into the current that leads you back to yourself, is the moment that you set yourself free.  Those of us who have come here to create our lives in the limitlessness of our own design are the courageous ones who see a world filled with beauty, who act in the face of fear and who dance in the splendour of our inner knowing.  We can design a life of our choosing if we are bold enough to take the path less travelled.  I’m still scared, I still work on giving up control and trusting that the Universe has my back - that mother earth is strong enough to support my bones and that the sky is expansive enough to lift my spirit.  There will be many days that I doubt myself and my capabilities to make it as an entrepreneur but the fear of knowing exactly where I will be and what I will be doing eight Mondays from now is far greater than the fear of the unknown.  The unknown offers freedom, liberation, depth, and a richness that promises a lifetime of excitement.  Of course I will be met with resistance, anxiety, fear, etc., but I choose to understand that these emotions are here to teach me something so that I may dive deeper into my essence and my reason for creating.  The journey of an entrepreneur is is a journey filled with uncertainty, but I promise that following certainty will never guide you back to yourself and it is your deepest heart’s longing for you to really see the totality of your being, your weaknesses and your strengths, and to step into the truth of who you really are.  If you feel called to go on this journey, know that you are not alone.  Even though I don’t know you I support you, the universe supports you, and as a community together we rise and liberate one another’s potential.