Learning How to Start

When are we going to stop? 

 

Just stop, now. 

Stop obsessing over your darkness and all the stories you've attached to about why you aren't good enough. 

Stop beating yourself up over mistakes you made in the past. The boyfriend who used you for sex was an asshole. The friend who betrayed you was betraying herself. The father who was never there abandoned a piece of his soul in his absence. Let it go. 

For the love of God - stop. 

Stop worrying of how others perceive you and what they think --- they are an imagined audience anyway, one who is too concerned with  what others' think of them to even consider you.  

So stop. 

Stop trying to fit in with everybody who pretends to be anybody. You are the only body you've got. So learn to love you. 

Stop wishing you were someone else. I know you've spent most of your life wishing you were smarter or prettier or taller or born into a different family with a different financial or emotional circumstance. 

Stop it. 

When are we going to start? 

When will you start living --- unapologetically---just for you. All of you. Every juicy inch of you. 

When will you start feeling the truth about who you are and why you are here. 

When will you finally see, for the first time ever, just how truly special you are. 

You are so important to so many people. 

You know that right? 

When will you believe it?

You are important even with all of your flaws. You matter even with all of your fears.

You are still worthy when all you see is darkness and your days are filled with misery and pain. 

You matter every second of your life. 

But when, my love, will you stop long enough to learn how to start?