Our Greatest Gift

There's been a lot of talk as of late over the differences between introversion and extroversion and one almost always comes across as being more desirable than the other. 

Extroverts are usually glorified for having natural talents and abilities.

It's a word that is synonymous with success in all of its definitions; in friendships, love, finances etc., but the truth is, both are extremely powerful dispositions. 

My favorite definition is that extroverts are people who feel replenished being in the company of others, while introverts find this state by spending time in solitude. 

Most of my life I've been categorized as being an extrovert. This made me feel powerful somehow, as if I won the lottery in the world of personality traits and I used my extroversion as a mask to hide my vulnerability, my sensitivity and my vast emotional inner landscape. 

I feel things very deeply but I got really good at hiding it. 

Hiding my true emotions served me for much of my early childhood and I'm grateful, but identifying as an extrovert when we aren't one is a dangerous game to play. 

I can be outgoing. 

I can be bold. 

I can be powerful. 

But I'm not an extrovert. 

If I'm around too many people at one time, I often feel anxious. 

If I'm around too many people for too long, I often feel irritated and unsure of the boundaries between my emotions and the emotions of others; not understanding this about myself led to much suffering.

It's no different than being told your whole life that you are an introvert simply because you are quiet, when in truth you feel replenished by being in community rather than isolation. 

I need to spend time alone, usually in nature, to replenish my spirit and these days I'm spending more and more time alone --- it's one of my grandest expressions of self-love. 

I'm most creative when I'm in solitude. I can hear my thoughts and feel my feelings and truly be present in my body. The body is a barometer for our well-being. We need to listen more to ourselves and what our bodies need. 

Don't let your life, personality, abilities, or circumstances be defined by anybody other than yourself. When we take the time to get to know ourselves, we become the expert on who we are --- that means nobody can project their beliefs on to you or take away what belongs to you unless you let them.  

The lines between my truth and that of the voice of the spectators was blurred for the first twenty-five years of my life. It was a powerful lesson in learning to trust my own inner dialogue and feelings. 

The greatest gift we can give ourselves is discovering our boundaries; what resonates in our bodies as a fuck YES or a fuck NO and trusting the feedback we receive.